70 | Positive Parenting: Parent as a Team with Danielle of Parent Wholeheartedly

Danielle is a Positive Discipline Certified Parent Educator who helps partners to Parent as a Team while helping families find sanity and strategies for parenting strong willed children. She wants you to become the parent you thought you'd be through Parenting wholeheartedly. Enjoy!

-How can we as parents make sure that we are on the same page with parenting?

-What if the family has gone through a Divorce, is it possible to remain on the same page with another?

-What is your proven 5 S system?

You can find Danielle of Parent Wholeheartedly:
Instagram.com/parent_wholeheartedly
(DM me the word CALM for more info on the group program)
FREE guide to Calm BIG Emotions - (kids age 1-7) - www.parentingwholeheartedly.com/emotions
FREE guide to Creating MORE patience - www.parentingwholeheartedly.com/patience

Transcript

Unknown: 0:09

Welcome to raising healthy humans. A podcast created for busy moms where you can easily find information on health and wellness for your family enjoys experts who share tips on how to raise children through each phase of life. Gather current information on nutrition and wellness and listen to Courtney, a health coach, movement specialist and founder of form fit and active and supportive community where she helps busy moms move more and raising healthy humans podcast. Courtney shares her personal life experiences, training, knowledge and conversations with other health and wellness experts so you can raise healthy humans. To do today, I'm speaking with Danielle she is a positive discipline certified parent educator who helps partners to parent as a team, while helping families find sanity and strategies for parenting strong willed children. She wants you to become the parent nice thought you'd be through parenting full heartedly. I really hope you enjoy our conversation Hi, Danielle, how are you? I'm doing well. How are you? I'm good. Thank you for coming on the show. My pleasure. Yeah, I wanted to ask you, how did you start with this parent whole heartedly? Where did you begin on this journey? Yeah. So when I was, you know, 18, when you're supposed to have your whole life figured out, all I knew was that I liked working with kids. So I ended up getting my bachelor's degree in child development from birth through third grade. So that came with a teaching certification, lots of student teaching. And out of school, I ended up teaching at a school that was called Educare. It's the Headstart early headstart program. And I was a lead teacher in both of those classrooms, which I loved. But I realized that what happens in a classroom is great, but what happens at home is what's mattering the most, and that's where kids are getting wired. And that's where parents have the hardest job. And they're doing the very best they know and can. But there's just a lot we don't know, we don't know, as parents. So I had the opportunity to work with Save the Children of core a program called early steps to school success, where it was a home visiting based program, I got to work more with the parents than the kids in their home, helping connect them with resources, during developmental screenings, bringing them books to read. And they brought me in as like a third member of their family. And it was my favorite job ever. It was such a treat and such an honor. And what I realized was like that was where the rubber hits the road, when I could empower the parent, then not only did it help that one child that one year, but for like, potentially their whole childhood and all their siblings, you know, as well, right? And so I'm always trying to, like, get to the point of most influence. And that's what feels the most like meaningful. It's what I'm so passionate about. So then I became a parent myself, and I realized, oh, my gosh, how did they ever listen to a word I had to say? Because parenting is just, you know, it's a whole new world. And I had my daughter's back to back there 15 months apart, which I don't professionally recommend. But I survived. It was a blur. And I was working at an in home daycare that a colleague could open so it could be with my girls, for the most part after my second was born, and eventually started leading a moms group because I was attending a church at the time, and they had a big kind of mops type program. And I was having lots of conversations with other parents. And thankfully, I had kind of a leg up with my child development background, even though it was still extremely hard. I at least knew what was developing developmentally appropriate each age and how to kind of like work with where their brains at and what to say and what to do to you know, get a lot of cooperation. And so I was just giving lots of advice and working with a lot of families and my second daughter ended up teaching me most of what I now teach now, because she is a completely different personality than my oldest where my oldest is kind of the by the book doesn't really have a lot of problems with life will do what you ask, you know, motions are probably even keel. My second is the opposite. She has high highs and low lows and no in between. She knows what she wants and she will let you know and there's really no convincing her other why's whether that's a bribe a threat or punishment and reward does not register. And so that's when I realized, oh my gosh, like, almost all families, if you have two or three kids have a kiddo that's like this type of personality. And then you need a whole new toolkit for these type of kiddos, because they really put you to the test. And that's what ends up like creating a divide between parenting partners, because they're both confused as to how to deal with this and kind of take polar ends of the spectrum as an approach. And so I just knew that this was such a prevalent issue that I decided to become a coach myself and be able to come up with more of a curriculum. And I felt like combined a positive discipline, which I'm now certified in, as well as a process called Writing a family business plan. And in working on your triggers, and patients as a parent. And so that's what I do now, after the pandemic, it switched from being in home to being virtual. Okay, starting my podcast, and you know, has eventually gotten me to where I am today, working one on one and through a group with family. So that was my long winded answer to your short question, right? Well, in it's funny what you had mentioned, with our children how like one you think you've got it all figured out, and then a second one comes in it. But I feel like even sometimes, just even with one of them, the the minute you think you have them figured out, oh, they flip the switch on you as well. Yeah, you've never parented them today, you parented who they were yesterday, so they're gonna keep you on your toes. It's crazy. So how you touched on a point that I feel like in my household, it's like this dance between my husband and I, this parenting as a team. How, how do we do this? Because I feel like, some days, we are on the same page, and we're speaking the same language, and everything is in line with one another with how we're going to handle certain situations. And then other days, he'll say something and I'll look at him, I'm like, What are you doing? Like that punishment does not fit the situation, that type of thing? Yeah. How do you work through that with parents? Yeah, yeah, you're not alone? Absolutely. I mean, every, every family is like a brand new dynamic that, for the most part, you did not grow up together. So you were parented differently and come into your family with completely different expectations, different mindsets, and meaning that you take from behaviors, just a whole different lens that you see things through. And you know, that applies to money that applies to a whole variety of things, but with parenting is extremely obvious, when you're faced with either backing each other up or undermining each other or feeling like, you know, worst enemies, which is very easy to feel like, oh, yeah, and usually there's a dynamic of a parent that is a little bit more on the permissive side, and then their yin yang, which is a little bit more quick to be strict, or, you know, that's kind of where the opposites attract mentality, can be a huge benefit, because it really keeps both partners in check. And you need you both of those aspects to create a balanced approach. But the how you get to that end result can come from a lot of turmoil and conflict in between. So I always recommend that it starts with a very curiosity driven conversation, where you're just able to really acknowledge and name, how different you grew up, how differently your parents treated you how differently you may have even felt when being punished or when you know, your sibling was being punished, or just other things that kind of played into how you're viewing things now, and and ask him out, you know, what's your relationship with your parents now? Is that exactly the kind of the relationship you want to have with our kids? Or do we want to do something a little bit differently? Or what is kind of the lesson, you know, that we're trying to learn when we take this approach? Or what's really the skills and the values that we want? At the end of this? Like, what's this whole parenting journey going to be for because I take the approach of treating your family like an organization and if you're the leadership of that organization, you really want to have a clear vision and mission and and goals that everyone's kind of on the trajectory towards. And we don't really do that with parenting. We kind of fly by the seat of our pants and throw spaghetti at a wall and hope that some good human comes out. And unfortunately, He, if if it was that easy, you know, we weren't gonna be talking about this probably. But it, there's actually so much that we have to be intentional about. Otherwise, if it's not designed, it goes back to kind of default. So a lot of getting on the same page requires productive, open minded conversations where you're curious about the other person's lens, and being able to establish end goals that you can both agree on, that says, these core values or this type of skill set, or this type of person is what's most important to us to be able to instill or cultivate or model within our home. Okay, and then let's both try to look into evidence based new ideas or ways that we know kind of cultivate that type of person or that type of learning, or, you know, really help us feel like that's the right approach for our kids. Because just because something works for somebody else, doesn't mean it works for you as a parent, or works for your child that's in front of you, even with all the best intentions, so being able to just learn and then some, you know, some trial and error is probably necessary, but then just being able to feel like you have enough information to make the most educated decision that might change tomorrow, and that's okay. Okay. So I'm thinking about what you are mentioning. And I'm thinking, okay, that's scenario, we should be talking about this before having children. But for many of us, we have it. I think, yeah. We mean, it was not covered in What to Expect When You're Expecting. Absolutely not. Yeah. But I also feel like, you know, there's just so much about parenting, you can't know until you're in it, you know, what, even we're all the world's best parents until we become one. So, you know, we all had these goals of like, you know, never having food in the car or never getting a tablet or, you know, right, right. But you just don't even know what you're signing up for until you're in it. So ideally, you know, some conversations before it gets too hectic would be great. But for the most part, you're going to have to try to carve out time to hit pause. Because you're putting together a car that it's halfway down the highway. Okay? How do you handle these families where, like you had mentioned, that one child, you're able to handle one way, then you have another child who you have to handle differently. But that child is now old enough to where they can definitely see that there is a different way they're being handled than the other one. Do you have recommendations on how to smoothly make that occur with families? Just because I have three? And I mean, we do try to keep things very consistent between the truth three, but you know, there's times where certain things change, and it does not go unnoticed. The other siblings? Yes, yes, I was that all this child looks back at my brother that was 10 years younger than me being like, this isn't fair. That's not how it was for me. So I totally feel you and so, so good to be aware of that, like you're a different parent each year that you're parenting, and it's okay to change your mind. And it's okay to handle things differently than the way you did in the past. And you can own that. And I think it's good to be able to, to speak openly about because otherwise, you know, it seems hypocritical or it seems, you know, inauthentic to our kids, because they're very perceptive. They're very observant, right. Give him credit for that. Yeah. Well, so go ahead. No, you go ahead. So for the, for the child, that is not as strong willed. I would I recommend to families that are coming to me because they're like, Okay, my six year old is fine, but my four year old is a hot mess. We ended up finding a lot of strategies that work for that four year old, and then I say, Okay, now that we know what works for kind of your spiciest, toughest child, let's try to now expand that toolkit out to everybody else. Because what may work for the oldest, that doesn't work for the youngest isn't necessarily true. flip flopped. Okay. What will work for the youngest will also work for the oldest just like the other strategies did, if that makes sense. Yeah. So you can always continue to, you know, challenge maybe your old way of thinking or if a few things felt more black and white before you can, you know, take a more collaborative problem solving approach, you know, instead and so, like those can, things can evolve. But the other thing that's important to instill is this idea A that fair doesn't mean equal. Fair means that everyone's needs are met. Okay. And in your family, everyone has different needs. And those are going to need to be met in different ways. And that's true for all humans. So you know, the old adage of like, yep, you know, it's not fair, too bad. I think we can just rescript that a little bit too. Yep. Like, fair doesn't mean equal, you need something different than your sibling does right now. And, and that's okay. When you, you know, you'll, it's going to be a different benefit to you in the future, because you're older or, you know, be able to help them see the complexity in that. Okay. Well, and I think you had mentioned that you'd like to create, like a business plan for your family. And I think, if you're creating that, I'm sure. It's all of your decisions in your household are based off of whatever that is, that helps, as well. Right? Totally. It helps create some cohesion and consistency across the board for sure. Yeah, yeah. Okay. So you had mentioned with the ying and the yang, of the husband, wife, dynamic, whatever. Do you notice families who either flip flop, Yang on some issues, Yang on the other? And then also, with this couple, when they think they're on the same page, and they've communicated about something, and then someone throws a curveball right in the middle of it? How do you handle that? Because my husband and I have been in these situations where he'll say something, and then I'm like, well, we'll we'll we'll, and I'll, and I know I'm not supposed to do it right then and there. So what do you what do you recommend? It's so hard in the moment, when something's happening? What do you how do you recommend we handle these situations? And mind you? I have older children now. So mine are 1614 and 11. So I feel like, you know, it's not like, Oh, come on, like, come talk to me real quick. Yeah, it's like, we got to get this situated right now. Right, right. Yeah, urgency is on the mind. Yeah, and, and there has to be a little bit of a shared expectation going in, where you're able to ask each other like, hey, when you see me, going, kinda off off the plan, or when I'm having a really hard time staying patient, like, here's what I want you to do, or here's how I want you to handle it, or, you know, asking that of each other of what, what would you like me to do or say, in that moment is always going to be the best place to start. Because then there'll be able to say, well, it would be great. If you know, we did some, you know, third, third baseman, coach, third, third base, Coach type, you know, symbols, then then I could, you know, that could help get me back online. But what I recommend to some of my clients that they find themselves in that situation, a little bit more off guard, then try to respond to the emotion that you see, rather than the behavior that you see. So you don't want to undermine them to be able to say, like, no, that's not your punishment, you know, dad doesn't know what he's talking about that type of like, you know, deteriorating the trust of that moment, what you want to be able to respond to is, I can see that dad's having a really hard time right now, I think what would be best is for everybody to take five, okay, and be able to just speak to the emotion you're seeing or, or just the problem is, I don't think you know, we can make that decision right now. Okay, you know, just being able to kind of like put a gap there that allows for saving face and also maybe having a sidebar before deciding for sure. How is the how are we going to handle this and, and then also having like a tagging out type of codeword. So a lot of families will see their spouse that's like, you know, at their last wit's end, and they want to be able to say, like, Hey, let me handle this, you know, you can go take a break. But, you know, they don't like being called out in that moment of like, you know, you're not, you're not handling this, you don't have your brain with you right now. So they'll come up with a code word beforehand. And the one that some of my clients use is hey, you know, what, can you go check and see if we got that package? Okay. Can you go check and see if we got the mail actually for a second. And then that's the code word for go to go take a step outside I got this and then that contents to help with that transition of not feeling like you know, you're dumb or wrong, but I got your I do really have your back. Okay. That's great. Thank you. What happens for families? If they're going through divorces? Is there anything that you can recommend? I mean, obviously, the co parenting best scenario, but what if a family doesn't have that, on the other side? Is there anything that one parent can do to kind of help create more consistency or normalcy for that child, if they have situations like that? Yeah, it's so challenging, because you can't control what that other parent ends up doing. Or they may or may not be receptive to your style, or the information that you're coming across. And that can be incredibly heartbreaking to know that, you know, your child's having a really hard time with the, when they are with the other parent, I actually had someone DM me on Instagram last night about that particular problem, where they were saying, you know, this, my child is coming home, saying that, you know, he just puts me in my room the whole time, and I don't want to go back there. And, and that's, like, so hard as a parent so hard. And so what I told her was, you know, you can send him resources, you can offer the support, when the if and when, you know, they're willing to be able to do more work on learning more of a different approach, because when they realize what they're doing isn't working, that's important, but sometimes, that's not where they're at. And you have to be able to recognize that what you can control is your own home and your own environment and your own parent child relationship. And all you know, any human needs is one person who just like is crazy in love with them, and you know, knows who they are, accepts who they are, and is seen and understood by them and feel safe. And so if that's at your house, then continue to kind of reiterate that in the most obvious ways, with extra structure and and routines and, you know, little rituals of goodbye rituals, and, and a calendar and just more things that make that so abundantly clear, so that it can help overflow and through the withdrawal period, have, you know, the back and forth, continue to send the messages that you really want to be thinking into your child. Okay. Okay. And you mentioned these little rituals, is that something you recommend for families to make sure that they're doing because it can be difficult, especially for families with more children to set time aside for each one of them? So do you have recommendations? I mean, when you said rituals that made me think that that was an opportunity if you just had something special for each one of them. But do you have any other advice for that? Yeah, having having you know, quality time, one on one time, during the week with even one child is difficult, let alone if you have two or three or more. It's such a great intention, but such a very hard thing to feel like to implement, even though it's so simple in and of itself. So I like to give my families several variations that meet the same heart behind it, which is that you are giving your child an opportunity to bring you into their world a little bit. And to feel like they are being you know, seen for and celebrated for who they are. And getting to have some type of special connection. So a goodbye ritual for is like as like a simple handshake. And having one that's different for each child is a total simple when that makes them feel really important. We have a ritual at bedtime, where I say the same thing to them as the last thing, you know, when they kiss them, goodnight. Things like that are hopefully the things that are such repeated memories that they become things that they remember about their childhood. And I think that that we can't discount the power of something that seems so simple, but with consistency over time, the compound interest truly adds up. So yeah, like a note in their lunch, you know, like a snuggle first thing for like a minute or two of the day. Those can really be game changers to help set the tone and help them feel important. And for the variations on special time. There's one called Yupik time where essentially, if you're co single parenting and all the siblings are still there, you just trade off who gets to be in charge of the you pick time. And so you're just kind of setting aside that child as the one who gets to pick the activity or kind of be the leader or teach everyone else what to do You and that helps send that same message or create that heart behind that moment. So there's things like that you can do to that logistically are more accessible. Okay? Well, in no matter the age, as well kind of writes that. And it's funny when you said like this routine of like the bedtime routine. My middle son, he's 14. And it's funny, because, you know, I do like this snug as a bug in a rug type thing with him at night. And I haven't done it for a while, because he he's on the top bunk and everything. But the other day, he was out on the couch, and I started doing it and the smirk that he got, it's just like, it doesn't matter how old they get, they still treasure those little Oh, yes, it's so. So I love that. It was just funny. Me, you made me think of that. So. Okay, talk to me about your proven size S system. What is this? Yeah, so that's the kind of overall framework that I work with my one on one clients. And so there's five S's, one of them is getting on the same page. And that's that process that I alluded to before of writing a family business plan. So essentially, it's like six conversational exercises that are built out through the curriculum where it's a little bit more of like a prompt or an activity that helps you sort through what matters to us most, what is our culture? What are our core values, our end goals, the ways we spend our time and money, and all kind of culminating in a mission statement that embodies this is our cornerstone, this is who we are, what we're trying to do and how we make decisions. And and so there's that process. And as one piece, is everybody involved in that process? It's just the parents, but I offer them questions to bring in their older children as well. Okay. So if they have, if they have older children, then they kind of have questions so that they can help get their input if they have younger kids. We have one piece of it is writing a family agreement, where it helps the kids decide how do we want to feel in our home? And what helps us feel that way? And what rules should we have so that we can protect that and it kind of boils it down to the why behind our family rules that we all agree to and applies to everyone in the home? Not just the kids, but the grownups too. Okay. Okay. Yeah. So and that's all within that five s the same page as Okay. Yep, yep. And so the, then the next s is sanity. And that is the mindset work and the trigger awareness and the coping strategies that we need as parents to stay calm, which is a whole separate toolkit, then how we discipline, right, because we can't discipline if we're so unregulated, we can't think straight. So I think mindset is a super on on underrated aspect of parenting, because we are deciding what to do so much based on how we're thinking, and if we don't actually realize that we're reacting to a certain behavior, because we're so afraid that 10 years from now, they're going to be dropping out of high school and in juvie, well, that's probably not going to help us stay calm and decide the best course of action, when truly it's just a five year old crying about a granola bar, you know. So being able to really think straight and become clear about like, this is why this bothers me, this is what I want to be able to remember in some of the hard moments, this is what I do to kind of process my own stress. That's huge. Okay, so that's that second aspect, sanity, okay, then the third s is solutions. And that's where the positive discipline strategies come in, as well as just individualizing and tweaking and troubleshooting. How do we get them to get their shoes on? What happened at bedtime? Why did it go through a ride? What do we do when you know they won't get in their car seat? Those types of things. I the value of individualized coaching cannot be overemphasized because it's just so amazing to vent, feel validated as a parent know that you're not alone. And you're not a terrible parent. But like there might just be something you haven't thought of yet. And when you get to talk that out and realize, oh, actually, it's the deeper root root is this, like, you can say, oh, yeah, my kid doesn't listen. Like Tell me more. What's the last example of that? What happened before that? How did you respond? What were what might have they'd been feeling or thinking in that moment. Let's actually like break it. down, then we'll find what to try next time, that's probably going to be the game changer rather than, you know, I guess I just don't know what to do. And then that helplessness takes over. Right? Yeah. And doing the same thing over and over. It's not changing, I don't know why you have the same page sanity solutions and secure relationships. Because, you know, the the cornerstone that all of our parenting is based on is a connected relationship where there's mutual trust, and understanding built up so that we can use that to kind of leverage the cooperation that we need or the perspective that we want to have and the influence that we have over our kids through that attachment. So you know, the things like the the quality time or the just being able to understand more of what's going on in their head so that we can actually have more empathy, because it seems so rational. That's huge for our relationship to feel like we're not just absolute adversaries, but no, like we actually do, it's us and them against the world rather than us against them. Right. And then the last s is support. So that is being able to have me on speed dial on Voxer. To when you really need a sanity moment, or have a question or example you want to share, being able to have the content and a full workbook that's like over 100 pages of everything printed out that you need to look at and study and read over and over. And just a VIP level of somebody who knows you knows your kids knows your heart and is able to kind of like, keep calling out your wins and cheering you on when it gets hard because it always well, but you get better and stronger at it. Yeah. But I love it. I love everything. Thinking about the children, and communication with them. I find and this is so hard to do, but correct me if I'm wrong, but I feel like it's one of those things where we want to, especially with our children, we want to help solve the problem. Oh, yes. And, and it's more important for us to just ask them questions, rather than try to sort in that. So? Yeah. I feel like that starts at like one when they're doing nod puzzles. And we're just like, Nope, just just turn it a little. Let me do it for you. Yeah, I never even thought of that. But yes, you are correct. I because I think you know, now that there's more emotion, it's not more emotions, the motions are different. And now I can speak to them differently more as adults, even though I, you know, they're not adults, but there's more adult type conversations going on in our household. So, but yes, even when they're little, how we have them work through problems, we want to help solve the problem for them, rather than allowing them to talk through us themselves. Yes, it's so so, so hard. And we do that for our partners, and we want to do it for our friends, too. We're just like, just do this, right. But then ultimately, we're robbing them of the life experience and the critical thinking skills to be able to actually learn from the problem rather than repeat it, you know, indelibly. So the positive discipline recommends an approach called collaborative problem solving, where you basically your role is to name the problem, because sometimes that is still very hard for them to sort out is like, well, actually, the problem is that there's one toy and two kids that want to play with it. Or the problem is that, you know, you're gonna have to go to school today. But let's figure out a way to, you know, get a reminder around it or something. But if you can identify that, then you can open it up to essentially a brainstorm. What do we do about this problem? Do you have any ideas? What could help? And if they don't come up with anything, you can always offer some options of like, well, this could be a solution, or this could be a solution. What do you think? And it's really just providing some stepping stones of guiding them towards an answer or a solution. But if they ultimately pick it, or take ownership of it, or decide that it was their idea, then it's going to be 100 times more successful that they learned from that and they understand what it takes to get to that again, and again, where they could do that with their friends at a play date. And they could do that same type of thought pattern, you know, at recess or down the road. And that's what we want is to work ourselves out of a job. So that As that's one, you know, a simple tweak that's really going to pay off each time. Okay, perfect. Do you have like one tip for our moms to be able to take with them to help them over this next week? Say, to help them with parenting more wholeheartedly, huh? Yeah, the heart behind that word is to remind parents that they have to be holed themselves, they have to be pouring from a full cup, they have to have the skills that they want to be teaching, they really have to go first. And you did not, you know, reach a level of full enlightenment, and then have kids and now you're just like Yoda, and you're bestowing all this knowledge, right? Like, you are absolutely still figuring out all of your flaws, all the things you never learned and having to grow up alongside your child as well. And again, very hard, very, very, very hard to do. And so realizing that, like you need your Gameface, you need to be well taken care of, you need to be prioritizing your well being and mental health because your ability to be the parent is what everything is based off of, you can hear all the greatest strategies, and never have the capacity to even access them, or do them or implement them without that. So that's why I have my podcast called failing motherhood because it really speaks to just how hard we are in ourselves and how much we feel like we're screwing this up and failing on a daily basis. But when you get sleep, and when you feel better, and when you really feel like you have something to give, you're going to be able to stay calm, you're going to be able to whether you know whatever your child throws your way, if you don't feel hopeless or helpless or defeated. So that that parenting wholeheartedly, is parenting your whole child and coming to it with your whole self, which is easier said than done. There's gonna be a lot of variables working against you, and a lot of seasons that have been harder than others. But Never feel guilty for taking the time you need to take care of yourself and knowing that your child will be better for it. Perfect. Thank you for that. Can you tell listeners where they can find you and what you currently are offering? Yeah, yeah, I'm most active on Instagram. So come find me at parent underscore wholeheartedly and send me a message that you found me from this podcast, I would love to know that and make that connection. And then my website is parenting wholeheartedly.com. And I have again, the one on one framework that we just kind of talked through as well as a group program. The only thing different about the group is that it doesn't have the family business plan component. But it has a really tight knit community of moms that have kiddos just like yours. And you get to share lots of ideas along the way. So that's called wholeheartedly calm. And that is kicking out for the fall. So you can come send me a message that says calm if you want more details about that. Perfect, thank you so much for taking the time out of your day for this. So so fun. Thank you for taking time out of your day to listen to our podcast. I hope you found this information valuable, and hope that you can immediately use some of the information that was provided, make sure to check out the show notes for all of the links that we discussed today. As a mom myself, I understand that at times you can feel alone and are looking for a sense of community. It is my goal to help bring moms together to find each other to help support one another and also help raise healthy humans. That is why I've created a Facebook group. It is free for you to join and you can go to moms raising healthy human. I also have upgraded our membership portal for you. If you are interested, I now have three tiers because I want to make sure that everybody is moving more no matter where you are. So the first one if you happen to like our weekly movement snacks, you're going to want to join our first tier, it's $5 a month and you will have a daily movement exercise that you can do. If you want to move even more, you might want to try one of our other memberships, where we go even deeper, and you can join us for live zoom classes. Remember it is my goal to help bring moms together in a healthy and supportive community. And I feel like that's what I'm doing with the form set community so Oh head to form CIT, s o r NSIT online.com. To see our new website and to learn more